kH Randomness!
by OneWingedButterfly
Summary: A really funny randomness story... Cloud's a perv, Riku's obsessed with money, Axel's just plain stupid... and Leon is uh...Not antisocial... Wrote when I was bored old story.
1. The movies

Axel- Dude I want popcorn with jelly!!!!

-Our story starts out out at the movies-

Naomi- Dude I want Kyo!!!!

Leon- DUDE! I want PEANUT BUTTER on my hotdog...Why the hell are you putting ketchup on it?  
Takes out gunblade Where's my peanut butta?

Cloud- I want bleep on my nachos!

-Sorry, but you really don't want to know what he wants on his nachos. Meanwhile, outside the theaters-

Kinky- Just leave the frekin poor people alone Riku.

Riku- Awww...Puppy dog eyes But I wanna dollar...

Kinky- Gives him a dollar

Riku- Another pwease???

Kinky- Gives him another dollar

-Meanwhile-

Cloud- OOOOHHHHHH!!!!! Look it all the hot chicks!!!!!! Holy shit, lookit those... Those-

Leon- Hits Cloud and knocks him out

Axel- Jelly!!!! GIMMIE jelly DAMMIT! JELLY!

Naomi- Calm the fuck down!!!

Cloud- Unresponsive

Kinky- Walking towords everyone, still giving Riku money.

Riku- C'mon, one more dollar and you'll have givin me a hundred...PLEASE???

Kinky- Oh look, I'm out of money.

Riku- NOOOOOO!!!!!!

Kinky- Hey guys! Where's satori? And why is Cloud dead?

axel- One) We don't know...We thought he was with you...

Two)Leon knocked him out

Three) Fear my breath! It's minty! Mu wa ha ha ha ha- Breaths on me-

Riku- Hey Axel, you gotta dollar? C'mon c'mon!

Cloud-Undead I see dead onions! We must save them!

Kinky- Uh...No thanx?

Leon- Onions make me cry...

Riku- Espicially if they die...

Axel- NO MY ONION!Snatches onion MINE!!!!!

Cloud- Hey.. Where'd that onion come from?

Riku- Your mom.

Kinky- Your underwear.

Leon- Whitie tidies???

Axel- Hey I wear boxers!

Kinky- Thanks for da info...Gets hit by shoe OWWW...Hey!Looks up and sees Satori on balcony

Satori- Hey baby Jumps off balcony and falls(lol) OWW...I Was supposed to land that! Owwie!!!!!

Me-Kisses his cheek

Satori- Thanks baby.

Riku- Eeeewwww...She kissed him! Do it again, do it again, do it again! Said like Cheese from Foster's home

Kinky-Kisses satori I wuv you! Yay cake! Eating bubble gum

Satori- Chomp chomp chomp! Who's that?

Kinky-Looks at random person I don't know..

Satori- I was making fun of you stupid!

Kinky-Ohhhh.

Cloud- Helloooo Kinky! Starts feeling on me

Satori- HELLOOOOO CLOUD! Ready to die? Axel?

axel- Yes? Glows on fire Dude? I AM SATAN HEAR ME ROAR!!!! ROAR!!!! Ok i'm done

Leon- Dude that was like totally lame. Like omg gag me with a spoon kinda lame.

Kinky-Sticks spoon down Leon's throat

Leon-Dies

Riku- This is a non-prep zone. All preps will be shot...Survivors will be shot again.

Axel- Gum! I want gum!

Kinky-Gives Axel a piece of gum

Axel- This tastes like powder...Baby powder...

Satori- And you know how that tastes how?

Axel- Cause I do biyatch.

Cloud- Hot peoples!!!!!!!!!!Steps on Leon's dead body as he runs to a girl

Leon-Unresponsive

Tiana-Uh... Who are you?

Cloud- Your new husband

Tiana- But what about Boston?

Cloud- Who dat?

Kinky- Who are you talking to?

Cloud-None ya.

Tiana-Boston is my boyfriend

Cloud- DAMMIT NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Hmm... Dude I want tacos...

Kinky- I'm a man.

Everyone- WHAT?!?

me- Jk Jk.

Satori- Not funny. I thought I was going out with a man for a second there.

Cloud- Taco taco!

Kinky- Dude, tacos are gay.

Cloud- MY TACO!!!!! Grrrrrr...

Tiana-Uhhhh...

Axel-Let's go get tacos!!!!!!!!!!!

Riku- K. Let's go to Taco Bell!!!!!!!!

Leon- Frothing at the mouth 


	2. Taco Bell

-They arrive at Taco Bell-

Cloud- TACOS!!!! And hot girls!!!

Tiana- I thought you loved me?

Cloud- Oh yeah.. I forgot.

Tiana- Thanks a lot.

Axel- This taco is-is a...Taco.

Leon- Spits out taco This is a taco??? I thought I was eating a potato...

Kinky- Well I'm eating crackers cause I'm cool like that. Doesn't like tacos

Tiana- You're eating white people?

Riku-O.O

Kinky- Yes.. I'm eating white people.

Cloud- Fuck your couch.

Leon- Oh you wanna start about couches? Your couch is so dumb that it sits there.

Cloud- Your couch is so fat that people sit on it.

Leon- Why the fuck are we making up your couch jokes?

Cloud- I don't know but up sexi. Oit oit.

Kinky-Uh...No.

Cloud- T.T

Kinky-Fine.. Yes you are

Cloud- .

Axel-I have testicles!!!!!

Riku- Gasp You mean your not a girl?!?

Axel- --+ Grr...

Leon- Bacon! Sizzle sizzle!!! Sizzler dance..Dancing

Cloud- Let's get it on.

Kinky-Let's not and say we didnt.

Cloud-Let's do and say we did.

Satori-Slaps Cloud upside the head

Cloud- Jealous are we?

Satori- I don't want a perv. going after my girl.

Cloud- No your jealous of her! You want me!

Satori- OOEye twitch

Kinky- Really Satori?? You don't love me you love Cloud?

Satori- Who said that???

Kinky- Cloud.

Satori- CLOUD!!

Cloud- Meep! Hides behind me

Satori-Punches Cloud

Cloud-Goes flying

Leon- CHEESE AND OREOS ARE GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!

Kinky- And I am their leader...Wah ha ha ha ha.

Satori- And i'm rite by her side.

Cloud-Lmfao.

Satori- --+ What's so funny this time?

Cloud- I ordered a burrito. Not a taco...I have a burrito!!!!!!! Mu wa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Tiana- You have a penis?

Cloud- Duh and not that kind of burrito, the edible kind.

Tiana- Penis's are edible!?!

Kinky-OO

Tiana- I likey Bostons penis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kinky- OO OO OOEye twitch

Cloud-Feels cheated on

Satori- Do you likey my penis Kinky?

Kinky- Uh...OoEye twitch

Satori- TT

Kinky- Whatever

Leon- I likey Cloud's penis!!!!!

Everyone- O0 OO 00Eye twitches all around

Cloud- WHAT?!?

Leon- Jk jk!

Axel- Hmm...

Riku- Okay...

Satori- Makes out with me and grabs my boob

Kinky- I've been molestered.

Cloud- Pushes Satori away and grabs my boobs

Kinky- Slaps Cloud

Leon- Slaps Axel

Axel- What was that for?

Leon- Bizznatch.

Riku- Shower power!!!!!!!

Satori- Kinky! Let's go take a shower! K? K?

Kinky- Okay... 


	3. The Shower

-In the shower-

Satori- I love you Kinky.

Kinky- I love you Satori.

Riku- I love you myself.

Satori- Slowly turns around O.O

Kinky- Riku...Wtf are you doing in da shower?

Riku- Eatin pickles.

Kinky and Satori- O.OEye twitch

Riku- Want one?...It's a dill

Satori- WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN OUR SHOWER??? GET OUT!!!!!!Throws soap at Riku

Riku- Falls on his face Runs out scared I saw Satori's manhood!!!!!

Satori- Now where were we? Puts his hands around my waist and pulls me close

Kinky- Leans in for kiss

Axel- HURRY UP IN THERE I GOTTA TAKE A PISS!!!!!!!!!!

Kinky-Aww shut up already...

Leon- Runs in Kinky, I must! I must do it now!

Kinky- Uh... May I inquire what it is you must do?

Leon- I proclaim my love!

Kinky- O0 Okay...

Leon- I love you!

Satori- -Evil glare-

Leon- Meep?

Kinky- Uh...Yeah...I would love to be with you...

Satori- -Eviler glare-

Kinky- But i am currently in love with the best guy there is, Satori!

Axel- Gotta go gotta go gotta go

Satori-Kicks Leon out, then kisses me passionently

Cloud-Falls through airvent, turns head and whistles

Kinky- CLOUD...

Cloud- Yo?

Satori- Now tell me this...Exactly what were you doing in the airvent?

Cloud- PO-TAy-TOe...

Satori- You were spying on Kinky's naked body?

Cloud- No i was spying on your naked body...

Kinky and Satori- OOEye twitch

Cloud- Jk jk.

Satori- GET OUT YOU !#$

Cloud- Yes maam.Gets out

Axel-Runs in Cant...Hold...Any...MoreUnzipps pants

Kinky- Axel, now what the hell are you doing?!?

Axel-Goes "tinkle"

Kinky- Faints I saw Axel's fireman!

Satori-Covers my eyes Axel, no one fucking wants to see that!!!!!!

Axel- But I had to go!!!!!Zips up pants

Satori- Ok you went now, LEAVE!!!!

Axel- Okey dokey.Leaves

Satori-Fucking grabs me and starts making out with me

Tiana-Enters bathroom Kinky, Kinky!!!!!!!!!!! Guess what, guess what!!!!!!!!!!

Kinky- T.T What...

Tiana- I'm on my period!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Satori- I give up! exits shower

Tiana- Eeeewww!! Naked Satori!!!!!!! 


	4. Dinner Time

-Dinner time. Someone or something knocks at da door-

Axel- Answers the door Potato?

Bianca- Ex screws me?

Axel- Your ex screwed you?

Kaname- You cheated on me bianca!?! How could you???

Bianca- NOOOOO!!!!

Cloudy- Cockaroach. Where's Kinky?

Axel- --+ Cockaroach...Who are you calling a cockaroach?

Riku- Comes out dressed like Brittney Spears She's so luckey, she's a star but she cries cries cries in her lonley heart.

Cloudy- OOEye twitch

Bianca- Uh...Is Kinky here?

Axel- Your mom's here.

Kinky- Who's at the door?

Bianca and Cloudy- Kinky!!!!!!!

Kinky- Gives them both hugs Pizza!!!!!!!!!!

Bianca- I brought a turrrrkey.

Cloudy- Turrrkey turkey turrrkey.

Tiana- Hits Cloudy with a frying pan

Cloudy- T.T What was that for???

Kinky- Everyone come in...

-At teh table.-

Kinky- Mayo Satori?

Satori- Mayo naise? Sure, I'll have some mayo naise.

Kinky- On yer face Squirts mayo on Satori's face

Cloudy- Food fight!!!!!!!

Kaname- Sigh

Bianca-Stuffs mash-ed po-tate-os in his face

Kaname- --+

Cloud- Sticks hand up teh turkey's ass and waves teh turkey around Turkey turkey!Hits Leon with turkey

Leon- CLOUD!!!!!!!! Puts fork tong up Cloud's nose

Cloud- Oowwwiiiieee!!!!!

Satori- Flies up on the rafters Umm...Not going to get in this.

Kinky- Chases Satori on the rafters Satori!! Cheesssseeeee!!!!!!!!!!

Satori- Nooooooo...Not the cheese!!!!

Kinky-Squirts a can a cheese on his head

Satori-T.T

Cloud- Hey let's have a food orgi!

Axel- Let's not!

Riku- Smashes a plate over Axel's head

Axel- x.x

(Zexion and Demyx come)

Demyx- Has his stuffed bear

Demyx- Smashes food into Zexion's face

Zexion- --+

Everyone- Notices the new comers and stop throwing food

Kinky- Uh...Can I help you?

Zexion-I've been watching you for a long time...

Kinky- Omg STALKER!!!!!! Are you the one who's been going through my trash?

Zexion- I only watched you in the shower! I am NOT a stalker.

Kinky-OO

Satori- Attacks

Zexion- Dodges

Satori- Leave my love alone you stalker!

Zexion- I AM NOT A FUCKING STALKER!!!!!!!!

Ariance-Pops out of nowhere There you are Demyx, big brother.

Cloudy- Too many people!

Kinky-I know.

Leon- slaps Zexion I proclaimed my love to her first bizzatch.

Demyx- AHHHH IT'S ARIANCE RUN!!!!!!!!!! Grabs Zexion and dissapers

Ariance- Aww...Demyx mean...

-Outside zee biulding-

Zexion- Crying Demyx!!!!!!!! You ruined my chances with Kinky!!!!!!!!!!

Demyx- But it was my annoying lil sis...

Zexion- Now she thinks I'm a stalker... TT.TT

Kinky- Runs out looking for Demyx and Zexion Hello? Stalker and chubaka?

Demyx- Chubaka???

Kinky- Oh there you two are... Zexion I have thought about your proposel thing...

Demyx and Zexion- And???

Kinky- I- I- I DON'T FUCKING KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zexion- Q.Qe

Demyx- It's ok, she didn't say no...

Zexion- Well tell me later...I gotta go...Pulls me in and kisses me deeply

Cloud- Walks out

Zexion-3

Cloud-OO

Kinky-3

Cloud- o0Eye twitches

Zexion and Kinky- Still kissing

Cloud- OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! SATORI SATORI Runs inside Kinky just kiss-ed stalker boy!!!!!!!!!!

Satori- Gets up so fast he hits his headOww...

Bianca-Goes over to Satori See, that just showz you that you shouldn't get up so fast kid.

Satori-Rubs his head Ow..How would you know...Just get out of my way. Gets up and pushes Bianca out of the way,  
goes over and smacks that bitch!!!!!!!!!!

Zexion- Morphs into a Power Ranger and kicks his vampiric ass... Just goes to show Power Rangers are way betta than vampires!!!!!

Kinky- CoughPower Rangers are gayCough

Zexion- Well your the writer, your the one that made me turn into one.

Kinky- Yeah...True...

Axel- Hey you two long time no see.

Demyx- Yeah it's been a while Axel...

Riku- Hey person who tries to use me! Waz up? You gotta dollar Pleeassseee??????

Zexion- Get yer own fucking dollar.

Demyx- Vent your discontent!

Kinky- Zexy your emo. And sexy and smexy.

((spoiler))

Axel- Hey I kill you ha ha... What now bitch?

Zexion- So? I'm in love with Kinky...What now, what now?

Axel-...No comment...Starts whistiling

Kinky- Don't tell me your in love with me too Axel...

Axel- Blushes Uh what makes you think that???

Kinky- ThatPoints to blush

Axel- Ya caught me...

Kinky- T.T Too many people like me I'm confuzzled.

Satori- Hiss

Zexion, Leon, and Axel- Don't hiss at me bitch.

Kinky- LEON!!!!!!! I forgot about him!!!!!!!

Leon- You..oo..Your forgot OO about me?Cries in a corner

Kinky- Uh...Sorry?

Axel-I love you baby Hugs and kisses me

Kinky- Turns away This is sooo confuzling!!!!!!!!!!!

Satori and Zexion- Slap the shit out of him.

Bianca-Let's have us a tournament... Winner gets Kinky!!!!!!!

Cloudy- Hey! She's my sister! I don't want anyone to have her.

Cloud- If I win can I have my way with her?

Bianca- Suuuurrree...

Cloud- Alright, I'm in!

Riku- A tournament? Sounds fun.

Demyx- Oooohhh! Ohhhh I wanna be special in the tornament!!!!!!

Kinky- This is turning out to be weird... 


	5. The Tournament

Silentrain12- Hello. I'm the announcer! And today is the Kinky cup.

Kinky- The Kinky cup??? Phssh...Who came up with that name?

Sr12- Fighting in this tournament are some of the toughest fighters around!

-The fighters walk outo the arena one by one-

Sr12- first up it's riku!  
-Riku walks up onto the stage-

Sr12- Followed by Satori!!!!!!! The vampire with crimson hair and black eyes and is uberly smexy!!!!!!

Satori- OO; Okay...

Sr12- Ready...Begin...

Riku-Takes out keyblade

Satori-Takes out holy sword and runs at Riku

Riku-Blocks with keyblade

Holy sword- Glows

Satori- Chants and turns into his full vampire form

Riku- Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!! It's Satori's full vamp. form!!!!! Meeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!

Satori- Beats the shit out of Riku and eats him Grr...Flesh must have more flesh!!!!

Kinky- Knocks him out with a chair

Satori-...

Sr12- And the winner is... Satori!!!!!!!!

Insert applause here

Sr12- Next up is...Cloud vs Cloudy

Tiana- But they're like...The same people with different names and Cloudy has green hair!!!!!!!

sr12- I know! Isn't it exciting?!?

Kinky- Not really...

Cloud- Takes out Buster Blade

Cloudy-Takes out Buster Blade

Both-Mirror each others moves for a while until...

Fucking Cloudy- Hey! Why am I fucking Cloudy?!?

Fine Cloudy- Stabs the real Cloud!

Cloudy- Ha ha...Now you cant have your way with my sister!!!!!!!

Cloud- Before...I...Die...I want to...Tell...You...Something...Kinky...

Kinky- You're in love with me too?OO

Cloud- You...Have...A nice...Ass...Dies

Kinky- Umm...Ok...

Sr12- We have dead contestants everywhere! So far 2 wins, 2 deaths, 0 loses...Next we have two men that are so deticated to Kinky they would die for her... First up it's the man with the gunblade the lone wolf,  
Squall Leonhart!

-Unenthueseastic clapping-

Leon- Hey!

Sr12- And next we have! The hot-headed, Flurry of Dancing Flames, Axel!

-Unenthueseastic yay-

Axel- do you people wanna be set on fire?

People- ...Maybe...

Axel-Sets half the audience on fire

Cloudy-Ahhh my hair!!!!!!!!!!Blowing on hair(If that's possible)

Sr12- Aniiiiiiiiwayzzzzzzzz... Begin fight.

Leon-Shoots at axel

Axel-Dissapears and reapears next to Leon

An annoying voice out of nowhere- LEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!

Leon-Turns head Who are you?

Annoying voice- YOUR ANNOYINGEST FAN GIRL YET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leon- Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Annoying Fan Girl- My names Angie!!!!!!!!Hugs Leon

Leon- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!Melts into ground

Angie- Well that wasn't very nice...

Sr12- Well looks like we have a winna...Axel wins!!!!!!!!!!

Axel- Whoot! that's 1-0 Leon...

Sr12-Next up we have... Zexion vs Demyx!!!!!!!! A very common yaoi pairing... GO!

Kinky- Go emo kid and mullet boy!!!!!!!

Demyx- MULLET BOY??? I'LL HAVE YOU Know i use two bottles of hair gel every-Gets knocked out by Zexion

Zexion- DIE MULLET BOY DIE!!!!!!!!!!

Demyx- Unconsious but alive

Sr12- Now me have the prelims.!

Screaming crowd(It's been that way ever since Axel lit them on fire .)

Sr12-It is Zexion vs Satori and Axel vs Cloudy... Let's go Zexion and Satori...

Zexion-Once again turns into a Power Ranger and beats the shit out of Satori Mighty morphin something power!

satori- Barf! Power Rangers? Gets knocked out

Sr12- ZEXION IS DA WINNA! CINNAMON!

Kinky- Cinammon? Wtf?

Tiana- Go Cloud!

Kinky- OO Umm...Tiana...Cloud is gone...

Tiana- To the bathroom?

Kinky- No he's uh... Up there...

Tiana- Cloud died?

Kinky- :( Yes...

Tana- Oh well. Alwayz got Boston. Boston is lame...Starts babbling about why Boston is lame

Sr12-Next up is Axel vs Cloudy...Who will win???

Kinky-Uh...I don't know... Well my bf is out...Looks like i'll have a new bf.

Tiana- Still babling

Bianca- Want an oreo Kinky?

Kinky- OO(At what's going on)...Sure...Takes oreo. Eats very very slowly

-Cloudy and Axel step onto the stage-

Axel-Sets Cloudy on fire

Cloudy- Ow ow owie! Hey she ow didn't say ow go yet!Beating on himself, turns into a pile of ash

Sr12- Well that was easily taken care of.

Angie- Putting Leon's liqued remains in a jar and carrying them off

Kinky- Ohhhh angie...Whatcha got?

Angie- I'm going to clone him and make more Leon's as my sex slaves!!!!!!

Kinky-Eye twitch

Axel- F is for friends that do stuff together, U is for you and me, N is for nywhare and anytime and place now here in the deep in the deep blueGets hit by shoe

Kinky- Ahhhh I hate Sponge Bob!!!!!!!

Axel- You Teary eyed Hate Spongebob??? How could anyone??? Hate sponge bob??? You are definently not my true love...I forfit.

Sr12- Here that??? We have a winner of the tournament!!!!! Zexion!!!! Give it up!!!

Kinky- Omg! Emo kid won??? Uh...Is that good or bad? Well he's hot and emo...But he's also manupulative and a lier.  
Hmm...Oh well he's hot and emo!!!!!!!!Starts clapping loudly

zexion-Comes up and kisses me

Kinky- Yay you won! Kisses him

Zexion-Starts making out and feeling on me

Kinky- Uh dude..There's people here.

Zexion- Oh yeah.

THE END! 


End file.
